American Standard

It appears that America is the benchmark by which violent crime in Australia is judged. Take the following:

Terrifying car-jacking bid like worst of US, say police
Mark Russell
November 4, 2007

POLICE fear two brazen and violent daylight car-jacking attempts on Friday could be the start of a new wave of street crime to hit Melbourne.

"They were random, brazen attacks, the sort of thing you expect to hear coming from America," Senior Constable James Midgley said.

Well, that's not exactly flattering for America is it? And why does America get singled out? What about places like South Africa - that's got to be worse than the U.S., right? So, should we develop an international classification scheme to rank the violence of car-jackings, with America a 10 and some place without cars a 1? Where would the apparently fearful and delicate Australians fit into the mix (particularly given that stealing cars is an iconic Aussie pastime)? Maybe Australians should be happy that they're only just now catching up with America, and haven't yet crossed into the realm of some of the REALLY violent nations.

UPDATE 11/5/2007: Speaking of violence in America, I just stumbled upon this gem at All Men Are Liars. If you've ever had trouble getting your hands on your shotgun in the middle of the night to defend your home, familiy and property, American innovation has developed the solution: "The Backup". This handy little device allows one to snuggle up at night next to his favourite shotgun. Some of my favourite bits from the website's FAQ's:

I sleep on the right side of the bed. Can I use it there?

Because of our unique patented design, you can adjust to fit The Back-Up© on either side of the bed, placing it where it is most convenient for you. In fact, we suggest you have The Back-Up© on both sides of the bed.. [But of course - after all, who has only one shotgun anyway]

I travel a lot for business or hunting. Is The Back-Up© portable?

Yes The Back-Up© is very light and portable. The unique patented design and construction gives you the ability to collapse it easily for travel, and place it wherever you need it. [Thank God! I always feel so vulnerable when I'm traveling for business. Glad those days are over!]